cktimes.ca Archives for The Pastoral Lens
The Pastoral Lens
Making A Relationship Investment
Tuesday, September 13, 2005
A number of years ago I was approached by a man in my congregation for a "favour." He shared with me that his father had been diagnosed with cancer and had only a limited time to live. The concern was that this elderly father was not ready to "meet his Maker" and so perhaps I could do something about this. John (not his real name) was in the hospital in Wallaceburg, and would be until the end.I remember my first visit with John. He was a bit gruff and uncomfortable with a preacher coming to see him, especially one whom he did not know. Surprisingly, however, he warmed up quickly after I mentioned a couple of his adult children by name. We chatted about his late wife, his children and grandchildren, and his beloved Netherlands, where he was born. I didn't try to cram any Scripture down his throat that first visit, but I did offer prayer, something he gladly accepted. I left our first visit with the impression that he viewed me a little like one of his grandchildren and that our next time together would pich up where we left off. Between visits I carefully digested a duotang of notes and information furnished to me by one of his daughters. This proved very helpful to me in making a point of contact in many of our conversations. In fact, I usually started our visits by making some reference to an incident or person mentioned in the duotang. His eyes wouldlight up and he would launch right in with a detailed explanation for me.
As time marched on, I could see the vitality start to drain from John's thinning visage. His warm smile stood in stark contrast to his sunken cheeks and hollow eye sockets. Nevertheless, our conversations seemed to revive him a little, if only for a brief time. As each visit passed I came to realize more and more how privileged I was to be treading on such sacred ground. Here was a man I never knew before his son came to me to ask if I could minister to him, yet in a short time we were experiencing the sweetness of friendship. Relationships, even those which don't have a long "shelf life" (like this one), take investment. They don't just fly on automatic pilot. The parties involved need to be willing to take the time to invest in one another.
John's funeral was a quiet, but dignified, celebration of his life. Thanks to my many visits with him in the hospital in the preceeding weeks, I was able to share as one who knew John, and not simply parrot back what others had told me about him. I had enjoyed the fruit of making a relationship investment. Jesus di that a lot during His 3 years on earth. He didn't spend His time stepping over and on to people on His way up the corporate ladder. Instead, He stopped to talk to the blind, the lame, the leper, and the prostitute. He may not have been CEO of a Fortune 500 company, but He did have a lot of investments... in people, the world's most precious resource.
So, let me ask you something today. How is your relationship portfolio going? Do you have a number of investments growing with interest, or are you hanging on to the declining stock of "things?" I'm warning you, though. There is a cost to making relationship investments. It will cost you time, patience, and some worldly pursuits. The choice is yours. Why not not start making investments that will reap interest in the long run. These kind always pay dividends.
